album name

Confidence Intervals

band name

by The Impatiens

Confidence Intervals Cover Art

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Track Name: An Intensive Training Program for the Mastery of Advanced Cartwheeling Techniques
Are you gonna be content to merely drift with me?
Picking up and playing with whatever toys we see?
I've climbed so high in the tree you can't see me
I tried to rhyme "tasty treat" with "appetite"
And it almost worked
Track Name: The Perks of Eavesdropping
She enters through the exit
Looking vaguely pregnant
Her flaxen hair a web of deceit in itself
She holds the door open
For what must be her boyfriend
They adhere to the diner's policy of Seat Yourself

They both just order coffee
And after a fit of coughing
He asks if she's had a chance to read the screenplay that he wrote
For a minute she thinks can she just
Break it to him gently but
Knows it's all going to come out after she clears her throat

Honey, you write like a mechanic
And your cooking tastes like World War 2
Your breath smells borderline satanic
And I'm just not the girl for you

At the table next to them
Another guy and his girlfriend
Are saying in hushed tones things that would normally be yelled
He looks deep into her eyes
And says that he would never lie
Which is in fact a lie and it's clear that she can tell

She says that she'll be leaving him
If she can't start believing him
But that's also a lie and it's one he's heard before
He tries to apologize
In hopes that she won't start to cry
But before he can she's already halfway out the door

Baby wait up, let's talk this over
Unless you don't love me anymore
Let's get married in October
But her answer is obscured

I pull out my cell phone to
See if I've missed a call from you
Of course that's not the case, and hey look it's almost ten
Quietly I pay my tab
Go outside and hail a cab
And can't believe my luck at having been stood up again
Track Name: Sister, When We're Married
Sister, when we're married
We will have our own room once again
Sister, when we're married
We will live together till the end

Of either of our lives
They started at the same time
Late one August night in 1995

Sister, you're so pretty
And in many ways you look like me
Sister, in this city
Nobody compares with you you

And there's really no way I
Could honestly deny
How hard I cry each time you say goodbye
Say goodbye
Track Name: Seasonal Affective Disorder
The sidewalk's all but covered with crinkly maple leaves
Late December, mild weather, 58 degrees
And no clouds of condensation linger when you breathe
But at least now you can finally pull out those long sleeves

And honestly, is it so bad?
Tell me you're not glad it isn't freezing
And you could probably feel equally sad
In any other season

The best revenge, they say, is simply living well
Your vindictive nature guarantees that you'll excel
Jettison the dross, please toss this lumber overboard
Don your bucket hat, weigh anchor, find a friendly shore

And just leave me to fend for myself
It's cool, my shit is hot and I've got prospects
And I don't foresee needing your help
On any future projects

Now I am certainly no magician
I'm hardly even a musician
But if it will make you listen
I'll pull a quarter out from behind your ear
I'll make the statue of liberty disappear
And turn this water into beer
Until you hear me loud and clear

The lonely island on which I have built my home
Means a constant nonexistent signal on my phone
Looking back, could you have been a trick of light and shade?
A washed-out moonlight rainbow cast across a snowy glade?

Still, you come through so clear at night
And if this ever stops I might be stronger
As it is there's no end in sight
Though the days are getting longer
Track Name: Marmaduke Dies
I wish
My life would end
I wish
You'd be my wife or friend
I wish
My hair was blond
I wish
My hair wasn't gone

The love that I am in with you
Writhes on the floor in pain
The love that I am in with you
Doesn't even know its own name
The love that I am in with you
Will never be the same
As it was when you were in it with me

I know
You wish I was dead
I know
Because that what you said
I know
You'll never care
I know
'Cause that would mean life is fair

The love that I am in with you
Is an oversized Great Dane
But the love that I am in with you
Has four legs that are lame
The love that I am in with you
Will never be the same
As it was when you were in it with me

And I know this whole thing wouldn't have started
If I weren't obviously completely retarded
And if I knew how to form words with my mouth

The dog that I am in with you
Is incomprehensibly large
But the love that I am in with you
Is most likely going to starve
The love that I am in with you
Will be buried in the back yard
Beneath the white birch tree
Track Name: Clock Rock
A symphony of ticks and tocks
Performed by that old kitchen clock
And several more throughout the home
Reaffirms that you're alone

A sound so soft it disappears
When you lightly cover up your ears
But right now it's crystal clear
The only thing you hear

The hands slowly pivot
Circumscribing time
Second, hour, minute
Concentric temporality in a handsome design

Now in something as a trance
You begin to sway and dance
And as you move from room to room
That eerie meter continues to loom

Slowly out of sync they go
As batteries start running low
Or as springs come unwound
And gears cease to spin around
Track Name: Gossamer and Glass
I never understood your taste
In mirrors and
If you call me today
I'll probably tell you that

I'll know the look that's on your face
It's clearer in
This picture of you
That's just out of view

Transparent undernetting hanging in the air
Just riding on the breeze
Revealing several trees
And it's just
A sharp reminder of the way you brush your hair
With strokes in fives and threes
And perfect symmetry
Your touch of OCD

I always wanted to expect
Your kindest "no"
Denying my calls
And taking my keys away

And yet things still fail to connect
When I'm this slow
And you trick me again
I'm sick of my friends

The slogan of a campaign that I don't support
Is now leaving my lips
It makes more sense than this
And it's so
The way you walk right up and tell me that you're bored
Those earrings that you chose
They're making my eyes close
They're making me suppose that

I'm not
Even breathing air
I'm getting off at this stop
It's not
Even anywhere
That I've ever heard of
It's somewhere where there's never any news
'Cause how can I explain love
When I'm just a perfect-smiled
Oldest child
Who can barely tie his shoes?

I never understood your drapes
They're sheerer than
The terror I feel
Whenever the phone rings
Track Name: Punctuality and Attendance
Wake up early for a pre-dawn mass
Get McDonald's and skip your first class
Drive up to the top of Garage B
Look down at the trees

There are preparations to be made
And reparations to be paid

So now you're thinking "how much time do I devote
To bumming around in flip flops with a spritzer ice cream float?"
Best not to focus on how much you'd like to sleep
Go down to the street

Where the jacaranda blossoms fall like rain into an ocean
And could it be possible you're pioneering new emotions?

Your salutatorian brain knows
It's such a well-blazed trail
It's the 405

The kind of party that you could never throw
Presents itself now as the only place to go
In between Catherine and Miyoko on the couch
You keep crashing out

This is no majestic apogee
Just an exit strategy
Track Name: Mailboxing
I'm sending this letter through time to you
Into the future a day or two
By the time you read it I won't be gone
And I won't be any less awkward or withdrawn

In the interim I'll try not to reveal
The handwritten admissions herein concealed
But if I let them slip it's not really a big deal
I'm sure that you're already well aware of your appeal

How long have you lived next door?
I don't even remember who lived there before
These days I don't get out much and so
You're basically the only person I know

In the interim I'll try not to reveal
The handwritten admissions herein concealed
But if I let them slip it's not really a big deal
Because they don't convey a tenth of what I feel

Slow-motion conversation, invitations not received
Unsurprising revelations, paid vacation, taking leave
Am I making progress any time I'm feigning sleep?
Inching closer to some kind of consummation dark and deep?
Track Name: The Quiet Heart
Sometimes you just feel
Like spinning your wheels
Breathing in the fumes as the tires peel

Learning to shun
The rain and the sun
As you're building up an immunity to fun

Appointments postponed
Reading at home
A little P.G. Wodehouse and Jerome K. Jerome

Curtains undrawn
You catch up on
What's been happening with your suburban lawn

Weekend stubble grown out over several weeks
Makes up for the lack of color in your cheeks
And your sense of humor is now so refined
Suberbly timed
Line after line
That you don't mind
How there's no one
There to laugh

From knuckly trees
The last of the leaves
Are stripped and taken by the autumn breeze

While from your room
This afternoon
You looked out on the chrysanthemums in bloom

And is it true
There've been a few
Times during which you actually had things to do?

Out on your bike
The streets sound just like
All those words you've never heard pronounced in real life

You lie in the center of your bed
With the sheets pulled up to just below your head
So keenly aware of each one of your toes
Your lips and nose
You start to doze
Perfect repose
Rolling over you
In a silent wave
Track Name: Product Placement
Any photograph of you
Could easily be construed
As an advertisement for anything else in the photograph

When somebody says your name
It ricochets around inside my brain
In a pattern that you couldn't draw with a Spirograph

Do you know what you have missed?
Do you know how many people I have kissed
Who weren't you?
Who wouldn't do?
One or two
Track Name: Elementary Education
I can only see the things that you show me
However little that might be
And that's why when you're like, "hey, no one really knows me"
It's hard to feel much sympathy
I was taken aback that time that you called me
And said this wasn't the end
But your voice had lost that edge that once enthralled me
So I said "well then let's just pretend"

I never wanted to say "so long"
And maybe you're right to feel that you've been wronged
But you're the only one who could finish my songs
And make them sound so sweet

And I suppose it's a bit unfair
To all of a sudden just not be there
But don't take it to mean that I no longer care
I just can't bear to admit defeat

And is it so wrong to want to always be with you
When you don't want the same from me?
I guess what I'm trying to say is how much I'll miss you
Now that that can never be
It's just hard to accept that I'm leaving with nothing
After waiting for so long
I wish that there was a way I could go back and unsing
All those word I didn't know were wrong

I never wanted to say goodbye
I never really saw myself as that kind of guy
But now what can I do but sigh
And bid you a fond adieu

'Cause what's the point in making a scene
When we can sever our ties and just walk away clean?
I mean, you know, we're only nineteen
It's not too late for us to start anew

I never intended to cause you pain
It's just that sometimes I think without using my brain
And since there's really nothing more to explain
I'll just begin my slow retreat
I never wanted to say so long
And maybe you're right to feel that you've been wronged
But you're the only one who could finish my songs
And make them sound so sweet
And make them feel complete
And make them more upbeat